The family I wanted to be part of, didn't contend that woman and her child. They didn't share my blood so obviously, we weren't family. But I still wanted my father's love. Wanting a part of that man's heart, I redoubled my efforts, knowing that I wasn't chasing after a dream. It could actually come true. It could actually be me that he was holding by the arm and so proudly showing his forbidden study to.
So that was what I did through the years. I worked really hard forcing my private teachers to work hard alongside me. So good were the results that I jumped classes and caught up with the normal level.
But that child was working hard too and even though father praised me, I felt that he wasn't praising me enough. Not with the same enthusiasm he did with the boy and I hated it, that that child could so easily obtain what I was fighting for to get so hard over the years, I really hated it.
Father grew more strange and strange. Liking other people's company, going out of his way to spend a maximum of time with that boy. Spying them once, I heard father tell that child, proudly calling him my son, how in the incoming years he'll succeed him, inheriting the Agon legacy. And I really felt bitter and wanted to vomit at that time. I was eighteen and his own daughter why was he giving another man's child my family name and so easily discarding my rights?
And so, everything planned for that boy - be it special classes, special readings or a book lent by father- I would force my way into it just so I could show him I could do it better. Father grew lenient with the passing years and I was using it at every turn I could get.
However, one time he said no and told me quite firmly "When you'll be twenty one I will let you do whatever you want not before."
I didn't recognize at the time the meaning behind his words. How could I?
So even though he refused to have me looked into the management of his companies, I bought books with my allowance and taught myself. Quite honestly it was boring and I hated it but thinking that at the end the smile of that man would be directed at me, kept me going on.
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