Mu Rong An was really idle, letting the perfect poise she was forced to learn since childhood bent a little as she looked at him. She didn't know how long she sat here, but with him as her personal attraction, she had yet to be bored.
He was diligently swinging his sword, again and again, and again; alternating between anger, frustration and a myriad of other emotions she had yet to decipher for he was trying his harder to keep a calm and collected face. If she had to guess, she would say that he was trying to ease his mind of something. It didn't feel like he was doing a good job at it though.
She was fixing him so hard that she actually managed to catch the slightest changes in his expressions; it wasn’t easy, however, for if women had a mask of polite gentleness always on, then some men had one of seriousness they were unwilling to part with and this man was doing a good job at being an expert in the art. Added to that that there were still dark bags under his eyes, making him even more unwelcoming with this sword in hand; some sleep wouldn't do him any harm at all!
At one point, he had taken off his upper cloth. The sun was coming out and he was sweating too much for it to be agreeable.
It wasn’t her first time seeing his upper body naked; she did undress him after all. Yet she still felt her breath taken away. For him she was part of the decoration though, he had long taken to not answering when she talked, so, she had resumed silently watching him. There wasn’t much else to do.
That barbarous sword that had always been unsightly to her every time they met previously, no longer felt so ugly. She could even find some beauty to it and was willing to compare it less to the feather used for poems. It wasn't all that bad that he wasn't a scholar; it was actually good that he favored martial arts more. His weapon was like a continuation of his body and suddenly her hands itched to take a plume and draw him.
She really wanted her painting materials back.
Closing her eyes, she could imagine herself sketching every curve of his being, every movement that he made, the swinging of his saber, the fluidity of his gestures, and the equilibrium of his pose. The sketching done, she would start to implement some details, the traits of his face, his eyebrows, his nose, and the form of his mouth. His deep and dark irises.
The expression of his face slowly morphed though, images of the first night superimposing on her imagination and when the serious face of her husband suddenly turned flushed in her head, she immediately opened her eyes, her own cheeks heating up, her breathing slightly irregular.
She shifted in discomfort and sipped on her cold tea for the aftereffect to disappear. Mu Rong An forced herself to think about something else, what triggered him into coming back here sounded good enough,
“How are things on your side?” she tried talking to him again.
In normalcy, he wasn’t supposed to be this free, that he actually had the time to come here was surprising.
He was sweaty and her lips twitched a little when he bent and took hold of her own towel to wipe himself. When had he taken it out of her cases, she didn’t know. He looked at her as if to say ‘Spit out what you have to say’ but it was truce she told herself, she just smiled -a truthful one or a fake one, only she knew- and asked him to drink to rehydrate himself.
He stopped being stingy with his words and answered,
“Nothing.”
A lie, she immediately recognized.
Her smile grew warmer, not adding anything anymore, she just nodded.
He came closer though, took his upper cloth previously left there, not too far from her, then he froze, abruptly turning to her. Approaching, he leaned on her and actually sniffed, making her freeze instantly.
“What’s this smell?” He asked and she was quite happy that she didn’t yet have the time to put on her earrings. Who knew if he was familiar with poison’s smell?
“Just the smell of the repelling incense, it’s really strong so even washed it stays on the clothes”.
That was true enough. That incense really did have a strong smell, however, by now she was so used to it that it didn’t matter anymore. At first, there had been some discomfort though and the lingering anger from this showed its neck as her voice, so delicate and sweet that it actually gave him goosebumps, resonated,
“Would you rather have me been bitten by mosquitoes?”
“…”
He still insisted, undeterred and heartless, without any thought of showing her any face, he said,
“This one isn’t good, it stinks.”
The smile faltered and her hold on the cup tightened not trusting herself to not smash the thing on the floor by his feet. She herself knew the incense wasn't all that good. Those were low-quality ones that were found inside this very manor. The ones he provided for her. Something he apparently conveniently forgot. For if the one she was currently using was really stinking, the others left didn't have that much effect and she could hear those annoying flies at night when lighting them.
Her smile finally disappeared as she said flatly,
“This smell is still bearable enough, yours, dear, I fear isn’t anymore, can you lean out a bit?”
General Ru’s body froze and she saw his lips twitch. To be fair, he wasn’t stinking that much if nothing at all, it was just slightly uncomfortable to have him sniff her, talking about how much she was smelling. The rude and blunt man wasn't more polite not even for courtesy, why must she be?
His face black, he didn’t turn around at all as he directed himself towards the water room.
***
The carriage, which was to take her to the village, finally came. It wasn’t luxurious at all, quite a plain one. Well, a truce didn’t mean victory. Mu Rong An took two menservants and two women and they went to the market. There was no veil in her possession so she started by having the servant buy that, before going down the carriage.
It was bustling and noisier than the environment she was used to but the smile she sported on was a triumphant one and for a good reason, she was finally out of the manor! She was feeling so suffocate there that even this place was a welcome break!
Since the man gave her almost free reign, let’s see how she’d buy whatever she felt like. Starting with clothes! Who cared about food? She needed to get out of her rugged clothes that were constantly reddening her delicate skin and finally wear something of good quality. Which was exactly what she did! Well, the quality wasn't what she was used to when growing up but it was far better than what she had been forced to wear this whole time!
Her smile, however, became strained once in front of a mirror. There was no mirror in the manor, so she was looking at her reflection for the first time in months. And for the first time in her life, she didn't like what she saw there.
Her eyes had bags under them, the long and silky hair she took pride in wasn't as beautifully trimmed as it used to be, there were knots she had been unable to comb and which hurt too much when force was applied so she didn't insist. Her skin didn't glow like usual, it was pale as if she was a bit sick. There were no ointments here or anything to put in her bath so even if she wanted to, she couldn't take care of it. Lifting her hands, she carefully looked at them. Using one to touch the other, to feel it. They were
no longer as delicate as they used to be, they were a bit rough from the labor she had done these past weeks, full of scratches. It was quite disheartening. Mu Rong An forcefully closed her eyes when she felt the tears coming close to spilling.
It was going to be alright she told herself with a resolution, kissing her hands. She was going to be alright. When she opened her eyes again, the smile returned to her face and she fiddled with other things in the shop, quite decided to remedy her appearance.
When she finished buying a couple of ready-made clothes, ointments, perfumes, and whatnots, she then turned to pieces of jewelry before refraining. Well, it wasn't remorse that stopped her, just that she shouldn't push it, not now anyway. So, the pricy jewelry could wait; she was so used to having them taken off that she really didn’t mind since she wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon.
It was time then, to think of what the manors actually needed. Which were many things! She had made a list before coming but had no illusion of being able to find the whole things here; and if she did, they wouldn't be as good as what could be found in the capital's market. However, it was still good to have beautiful tapestries and curtains than none at all. Since she didn’t know the price of those particular things, she had to turn to her servants.
Mu Rong An knew the prices of goods at the capital but not at the borders but from what she understood, those things were cheaper here and she actually discovered a stingy side of herself as she started arguing over prices with merchants. It must be said that what she was buying was mainly for her own comfort since Ru Shan Yong wasn’t a permanent stayer at the manor; of course, if possible she would try to buy the maximum of things with the money that had been left with her moreover that she had to curb what was left of the money between decoration, cleaning tools, kitchen ingredients, and other necessities. And so, for those who tried to make her pay more than what she was willing to, she would present her brightest smile and argue seemingly amiably. Vendors had no way to lose their temper with such a calm person.
Such a thing took her almost the whole afternoon.
***
When most of the list was checked, she was quite satisfied. Along the way, she saw a store selling sweets. Mu Rong An didn’t really have a sweet tongue, that was mostly General Ru’s kind of thing. Something about giving energy; almost every member of his troops ate at least some sugar cane every other day. However, she did miss delicacies a little. Since coming here actually, she had had no dessert at all. Maybe it was to get back at her for taking his fruits and sweets on the road but every time the meals were delivered on those selected days, there weren’t any sweets at all!
She felt a tad sour though, that it wouldn’t be where she used to buy hers. At the capital, the famous ‘Delicate Delicacy’ store knew her taste very well and would usually lessen the amount of sugar for her commands. In the end, despite where it was, she still wanted to taste it. Her previous burned cooking curved her likings a bit and for now, she was craving sweets. She would deal with the sugar level later. That was her thought.
However, as fast as she personally took the bag from the vendor, a child of ten or twelve maybe tried to snatch the bag, her veil tearing and falling in the commotion. She had one of her servants stop him while she reprimanded him. He had, apparently wanted to take them as they were displayed in the store but unfortunately, she bought the whole thing. Caught red-handed he struggled and insulted her unceremoniously before, at the end of his rope and in resignation, starting to tear up and cry like the child he was. He was saying things about his mother being sick. Some passer-by’s hearts softened while Mu Rong An’s polite smile grew warm and wide. The manservant who was holding the boy looked at her, but she still had to give the order to release the person, so he could only hold on as Mu Rong An addressed the child once again.
“You’re this big, can’t you think of a better lie or is your mother teaching you how to swindle people like that?”
People were gathering around them already. She didn’t mind causing a commotion, the name that would be smeared wouldn’t be hers. It was a retaliation as good as any, her bitter ego said.
The child stopped crying a bit before tearing up even more pitifully swearing on whoever-he-could-think-of's head that he was saying the truth. His poor mother was deathly sick so he wanted to please her with some sweets.
“Is that so?" Mu Rong An turned to the servant holding the bag. "Pack three parts aside” she caught sight of the child's eyes brightening before adding, "now try telling the truth for me to hear and you can have it," smiling she didn't forget, "some apologies to accompany it all would be welcome too."
She was being difficult and didn’t mind one bit, the boy cried even more and she didn’t yield in at all. Truthfully speaking what she was after wasn't the truth, she could care less about it. He wanted sweets so he tried to take it since he didn't have the money- if there was more to the story she wasn't interested in knowing. However, she had yet to receive her apologies. In his rants earlier, he dared criticized her face. On any other day she wouldn't have minded too much but today, today, that insult was particularly displeasing to hear. Her reflection in the mirror had been far too unpleasant and she was a bit vain but she needed compliments at this moment, certainly not insults. It wasn’t that she did suddenly become ugly as he said, but just that her pride was demanding reparation for such prejudice on this sour day!
“What’s happening here?” asked someone.
The voice was fluent and light, and its beholder was a thin and beautiful man who had a sword by his left side.
“He tried to steal for his sick mother, the poor boy” responded someone.
“That noblewoman is heartless,” whispered another, acknowledged by most.
Looking at the boy who was crying more and more, and the woman who was leaning on him but apparently had no intention to free him, the man had enough. From where they were they couldn't hear what was being said by the woman but obviously, whatever she was saying was just torturing this child for his tears were even more affluent now.
"Aren't you lot going to do something? She is tormenting him!"
The crowd mumbled incomprehensible things, shaking their head and at last, a man's hesitant voice was heard.
"And what will you have us do? He did indeed try to steal from others!"
"The one who shall punish him is still not her!"
Resolutely, he walked to the servant, yanking the boy out of his grasp.
“That’s enough” he shouted putting the teenager behind himself, effectively shielding him.
Mu Rong An looked up at the vehemently speaking man, valiantly dressed. She narrowed her eyes, carefully taking in the beauty in front of her, and on a hunch, let her gaze linger on the man's chest. It wasn't like she could confirm it, but it wasn't like his voice sounded very manly so she rather trusted her feeling on this. This newcomer was certainly the female lead of the second arc, Feng Xi. She blinked a couple of times at that realization then her gaze went to the boy who was hiding behind his savior and recognition flickered in her eyes. This child must then be Yan Mi.
If she remembered it right, in the book too, Feng Xi protected the boy against the vendor when he caught the stealer red-handed. This female lead was a trusting person so she quickly believed him only to later discover the lie. But in the end, after a fair share of adventures together, she took the orphan boy as her brother and he was even present on her wedding day, later even entering General Ru's army.
Mu Rong An pursued her lips and took in hand the veil that her servant was presenting her, placing it back on her face.
The person in front of her was her husband’s soulmate. Her lips curved into a warm smile but only she knew what she truly felt in the end.
